Opinion: Jurassic World’s major fault

There have been a lot of really cool movie trailers coming out recently. To name a few: The awesome new Star Wars trailer with Chewbacca, the Antman trailer with the hilarious train moment, and the Jurassic World trailer that has some people literally shitting their pants with glee. I liked all of them… but I think Jurassic World missed something obvious.

They should have put feathers on their new super dino.

from http://static.origos.hu/s/img/i/1408/20140824richard-attenborough.jpg

“Owch, right in the legacy.”

Believe me… after coming up with this idea, I did some research. I’m not the only person that feels this way. But I haven’t seen anyone try to fix the problem, or explain how they could/should have done it. So first off, if you haven’t seen the trailer, give it a quick watch. I’ll embed it, make it easy on you. Then I’ll move on to what they should have done.

The trailer is a whole lot of neat dinosaur CGI interspersed with some of Chris Pratt talking at the camera and a slew of people running around and screaming. It looks good enough, I don’t expect much more than some fun dinosaur action from a Jurassic Park movie. I don’t have any real complaints about the plot they’re pushing or the general look of the film. but for some inexplicable reason, they’ve decided not to follow the science.

In their initial movie canon, the dinosaur DNA, that they got out of those amberfied mosquito, is spliced with frog DNA to make viable creatures, that frog DNA is also what causes the problems in the first movie since allowed the dinosaurs to reproduce asexually. That missing knowledge about how dinosaurs looked, along with their solution to repairing the damaged DNA, allowed them retcon the visuals of the story by saying it was the frog DNA that caused them to be featherless, which is all 100% above board and good. In the book, they’re spliced with not only frogs, but also lizards and birds. That’s not to say Chrichton didn’t make the same claims as the movies concerning certain leather skinned giants, but this movie has the ways and the means to make the story even more realistic and cool, by modifying what we know about the park and adding real world science into the mix.

The theory and evidence of feathered dinosaurs hasn’t been around all that long, but it’s quickly becoming the accepted and predominant theory about their appearance. Had Jurassic World followed current paleontology they could have easily had their new super intelligent and agile dinosaur covered in feathers. In fact, all they need is a single line of dialogue, somewhere in a tour of the facilities that mentions that the old way they used to do things became outdated as new information emerged and they decided to switch their efforts into breeding new, more realistic dinosaurs by swapping the frog DNA with bird DNA (which also solves the problem of the dinosaurs being able to self-fertilize). The first product of that new technique could easily be the murder-saur that kills indiscriminately (from that trailer).

from http://i1183.photobucket.com/albums/x473/arys009/Feathered%20Fellow/feathered.jpg

It could have looked like this! Instead of just looking like “any other dinosaur.”

As neat as the trailer is, I’d be much more impressed by a feathered dinosaur running amok, killing off the lesser, bastardized half-dinosaurs. A monster made larger, fiercer and more intelligent because they cut out the weak-ass frog DNA and inserted something from the horrific beast called Chicken. Bonus Round: They get the same exact plot that they have now, but they don’t have to go all heavy handed on the anti-GMO propaganda that has seriously started to become a stereotype.

Hollywood, hire me next time you need a punch up on a script. I’ll fix your logic gaps and give you a cooler dinosaur to boot.

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