Original Game: Future War

So… lets talk about War. It’s a game, sure, but only just barely. If you’ve lived under a rock or never seen a deck of cards before here’s how it works. 1st you split the deck into two halves, give one of the halves to another human being (or… I suppose you don’t really even need a sentient opponent), 2nd draw a card from each deck and see which is bigger, 3rd repeat. 4th If you tie, draw a few face down-cards then another face-up card,see which is bigger to resolve both fights. That’s it. Nothing else. Well you see the problem just as much as me, it’s not really a game, there is no gameplay involved. I decided to fix it. I call this new game… Future War (starring Daniel Bernhardt).

Future War Box Art

To make this new and updated version of War, we have to first identify what the problem with War is, and how those problems are solved.

Well, First of all, the art sucks. Compare these two. The first is your basic playing card, and it’s boring as shit…

king

UPGRADE TIME

Robert z'dar king

BOOM, MOTHERFUCKING ROBERT Z’DAR

 

Ok, we’ve fixed the worst part, now lets work on the gameplay. Biggest issue, you can’t just have a card that’s all powerful. Aces in War aren’t a good mechanic, beat anything with the exception of another Ace? What if your luck is terrible and your opponent gets all 4 aces at the beginning – sure you could rely on the War mechanic to rescue you, but it’s unlikely you’ll win. It’s not fun. So lets fix the aces, the ace needs to be the most valuable still, but it has to have a weakness. So how about the Ace can beat any face card, but loses automatically to a number card. Super powerful in some instances, but super weak in all others.

Daniel Ace

Daniel Bernhardt handily defeats Robert Z’Dar, but loses to a 2 of hearts

That’s a good start but it’s not enough, we need to give the game an element of strategy. How about we add a hand of cards to the game. War generally has you moving cards directly from the deck to the field, but lets make every player hold 2 cards in their hand and choose one to play each turn. It should lend a small amount of strategy to the game… but stopping there would be a mistake, we can make it even better.

You say, “So what, drawing 2 cards doesn’t matter when you have no idea what is in your opponent’s hand! That’s not strategy!” Hush now child, I was getting to that. This is the best part too. The decks that you draw your cards from… they’re face-up. *BOOOF* I just blew your mind. You know every card that is going into your opponent’s hand, so you have the information to know what you can beat in their hand and they know what they can beat in your hand. Then you just have to play based on instinct or on probability. Still may be mostly luck, but it provides (at minimum) the illusion of agency.

Future War is superior in every way to normal War. Try it out.

dinosaur Jack

Dinosaurs from the future from the past approve!

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